In this episode, I sit down with Farm Family Coach Kalynn Spain – a certified Leadership Coach with a degree in Conflict Resolution Studies and over five years of training and volunteer experience as a mediator. In this discussion Kalynn shares recent insights from her experience with moving in with the in-laws and beginning the challenging, but hopeful journey of farm succession planning.
We also explore how healthy boundaries are essential to stay firm as a family when transitioning to farm life. We discuss what it looks like to remain true to your own family values, dreams, and schedules while integrating with life on the farm.
By the end of the episode, you’ll have gained a new perspective on the importance of boundaries for self-care, a sense of safety, living authentically, and working together towards a more intentional future.
“It’s really about centering ourselves and using our own control and our own sense of authority. And I think this can apply in adult relationships as well. Because it’s really hard to center ourselves sometimes when we feel uncomfortable, or maybe someone’s making a request of us where we feel like the farm is asking us for our time, and like the farm comes first. There are all sorts of expectations. It’s the culture of the farm and it can be really hard to say no.” – Kalynn Spain
Mentioned During This Episode
Books
People
- Dr. Becky Kennedy: Clinical Psychologist and Founder of Good Inside
- Marsha Harris: Marriage and Family Therapist
- Brené Brown: Researcher, Storyteller, and Author
Other
Elaine Froese Resources & Links
- SPEAKING – book Elaine for your next event
- COACHING – find your Farm Transition Coach
- MEMBERSHIP – become at Farm Family Harmony Member
- RESOURCES – download for FREE
- CONTACT – take the next steps in your transition
About Our Guest
Kalynn Spain is a mother of two, farm partner, and bridge builder in the agricultural community in Manitoba. She is passionate about empowering young farmers and creating strong rural communities.
Kalynn is a Certified Leadership Coach, holds a degree in Conflict Resolution Studies, and brings over five years of training and volunteer experience as a mediator. Kalynn has spent her entire career in the agri-food industry, working with organizations such as the Canadian Foodgrains Bank, St. Norbert Farmers Market, and Keystone Agricultural Producers. She more recently worked for several years with students enrolled in agricultural programs in the Faculty of Agricultural and Food Sciences at the University of Manitoba.
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Timestamps
[0:00:30] Introduction to Kalynn Spain
[0:02:57] Boundaries and emotional regulation
[0:08:01] Assumptions began after moving to the farm
[0:08:43] We don’t always need to give specific reasons
[0:09:07] External vs internal boundaries
[0:10:04] Saying no authentically
[0:13:29] Finding the courage to set boundaries
[0:16:46] Healthy ways to build trust
[0:21:00] Going to a financial planner for clarity on and off the farm
[0:26:00] Challenging assumptions and the stories we tell ourselves
[0:28:47] Boundaries promote safety and the authentic self
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