{"id":4748,"date":"2011-08-09T21:22:09","date_gmt":"2011-08-09T21:22:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/elainefroese.primeconcepts.com\/blog\/?p=147"},"modified":"2011-08-09T21:22:09","modified_gmt":"2011-08-09T21:22:09","slug":"foundation-of-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/","title":{"rendered":"FOUNDATION OF LOVE"},"content":{"rendered":"

FOUNDATION OF LOVE<\/h2>\n
<\/div>\n

February 9, 2009<\/p>\n

This year my theme word for the year is love.\u00a0 Courage, hope, delight, have been themes in previous years, and I never know what the current year will hold.<\/p>\n

Love is a good theme for me this year as our parents are dealing with health issues, and family dynamics can be strained by the decisions ahead that are hard to make.<\/p>\n

Gary Chapman\u2019s newest book \u201cLove As A Way of Life: seven keys to transforming every aspect of your life,\u201d is an interesting read on the key foundation of love. Chapman\u2019s earlier book on the 5 Love Languages helped couples understand the way that they would like to be shown love, with time, gifts, actions, verbal affirmation or meaningful touch.<\/p>\n

\u201cEach day involves countless interactions with others. An attitude of love may not be your top priority in some of these encounters. But what if the ancient maxim of \u201clove your neighbor as yourself\u201d applied to everyone?\u00a0 By giving love, instead of grabbing for it, you\u2019ll become the person others want to love in return, no matter what their role is in your life. (www.garychapman.org<\/a>)<\/p>\n

If we could embrace courtesy, honesty, kindness, generosity, humility, trust in our relationships, our farm families would hum along much more smoothly.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve been tempted to run a boot camp for daughters-in-law who are looking for common courtesy from their in-laws. Then I would also need a camp for the farming sons who feel stuck in the middle, and mother-in-laws trying to mediate family harmony. The founding fathers want a boot camp for understanding women in general. Are you ready to choose to be more loving towards your farm team?<\/p>\n

As I was waiting for a computer repair, I overheard another customer confide to the store clerk that he had a secret credit account that his wife had no knowledge of, thus he could buy electronics. The scary thing was that the clerk confided that she too has a secret credit card.\u00a0 Honesty is not part of the framework for these folks.<\/p>\n

What one thing do you think you could work on this month that would make a huge difference in how you love your family?<\/p>\n

Love is a choice, not just a warm feeling.\u00a0 We can choose to love our farm family, although we know some are easier to love than others.<\/p>\n

I believe that when you love someone, you seek to resolve differences quickly. Having a habit of relaying your intent with words, is helpful compared to silencing your thoughts. People don\u2019t want to (and can\u2019t) read your mind. Silence is helpful in sensitive conversations where it \u201chelps to do the heavy lifting\u201d.\u00a0 Silence is brutal when the one you love will not share their true thoughts and feelings.<\/p>\n

Oh Elaine, if the other person would really love me and just change, things would be so much better.\u00a0 Wrong.\u00a0 Only you can change you. You have no control over manipulating how another person loves you. You can ask for what you need, but the other person gets to choose how they respond.<\/p>\n

This is what makes life on the farm so interesting. Each farm team member has different needs for love and various ways of showing love. Or they don\u2019t know it takes a conscious effort to choose to love.<\/p>\n

Here are a few of Chapman\u2019s keys that I have adapted:<\/p>\n

Courtesy would mean treating your farm family better than your friends. Letting them speak without interruption, knocking or ringing the bell before entering the house, picking up after yourself, and putting tools away in the shop.<\/p>\n

Kindness is bringing extra water out to the field, sweeping out the truck box, and the cab, and asking if there is anything else you can do to make things easier. Kindness may be a note of thanks for being a caring daughter-in-law, raising great-grandkids. Many farming sons and daughters are starved for a simple act of kindness expressed with a note of appreciation.<\/p>\n

Honesty is expressing your true feelings without fault-finding or blame. Know that being honest will not be held against you, but will create a farm family culture for making great decisions, with respect. No more stealing car gas from them!<\/p>\n

Generosity is the commitment to have a giving hand for financial support, and the giving of your precious time to a good cause. For some farm folks, it means doing without so that the larger goal can be accomplished sooner, or being content with what they have. There is also a certain generosity of spirit that is enjoyed when people choose to be optimists and see the positive opportunities, rather than dwelling on the negative.<\/p>\n

Humility is having a servant’s heart and not dwelling on seeking recognition. We all like to be appreciated, yet I see humble successful farmers as folks who choose to serve, build their businesses, and not dwell too long on pride or who get the credit for success. They are people who lead by example.<\/p>\n

Faith, hope, and love. These three abide, but the greatest of these is love. (1. Corinthians 13).<\/p>\n

Let me know what aspect of your farm family\u2019s love foundation you\u2019ll be working on this month, and for the rest of the year.<\/p>\n

Are you willing to take a journey towards being a more loving person? Join me, I think love is a fabulous theme for every day of the year and the rest of your short life.
\n________________________________________________________________________________
\nElaine Froese is a catalyst for courageous conversations as a farm family business coach. Share your thoughts at www.elainefroese.com<\/a> or call 1-866-848-8311 to book her for your association\u2019s AGM.\u00a0 A book can change your life\u2026order \u201cPlanting the Seed of Hope on Elaine\u2019s website.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

FOUNDATION OF LOVE February 9, 2009 This year my theme word for the year is love.\u00a0 Courage, hope, delight, have been themes in previous years, and I never know what the current year will hold. Love is a good theme for me this year as our parents are dealing with health issues, and family dynamics…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[293,46,25,294,74,127,295,296,35,195,76,130,39],"class_list":["post-4748","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","tag-attitude-of-love","tag-choice","tag-farm","tag-farm-bulk-tank","tag-farm-families","tag-farm-family","tag-farm-family-culture","tag-farm-familys-love-foundation","tag-farm-folks","tag-farm-team","tag-farmers","tag-farming-sons","tag-love"],"yoast_head":"\nFOUNDATION OF LOVE - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"This year my theme word for the year is love.\u00a0 Courage, hope, delight, have been themes in previous years, and I never know what the current year will hold.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"FOUNDATION OF LOVE - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This year my theme word for the year is love.\u00a0 Courage, hope, delight, have been themes in previous years, and I never know what the current year will hold.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-08-09T21:22:09+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Elaine Froese\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Elaine Froese\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Elaine Froese\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3\"},\"headline\":\"FOUNDATION OF LOVE\",\"datePublished\":\"2011-08-09T21:22:09+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/\"},\"wordCount\":970,\"commentCount\":0,\"keywords\":[\"attitude of love\",\"Choice\",\"Farm\",\"farm bulk tank\",\"Farm Families\",\"Farm Family\",\"farm family culture\",\"farm family\u2019s love foundation\",\"Farm folks\",\"farm team\",\"Farmers\",\"Farming sons\",\"love\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/\",\"name\":\"FOUNDATION OF LOVE - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2011-08-09T21:22:09+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3\"},\"description\":\"This year my theme word for the year is love.\u00a0 Courage, hope, delight, have been themes in previous years, and I never know what the current year will hold.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"FOUNDATION OF LOVE\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/\",\"name\":\"Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3\",\"name\":\"Elaine Froese\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/4df8162d4b4a0bb7b79f735f1fd39bc21a692ec62908384041c34339d64bd119?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/4df8162d4b4a0bb7b79f735f1fd39bc21a692ec62908384041c34339d64bd119?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Elaine Froese\"},\"description\":\"I\u2019m Elaine Froese, a lifelong farmer. Every day, I use my background in conflict resolution and communication to help fellow growers and ranchers face make-or-break issues head on \u2014 so they can focus on the business of farming. My expertise is sought after across Canada, and in the U.S. I'm a catalyst for courageous conversations, new scenarios and more profitable businesses. Many of my clients say: \u201cI wish I had met you 10 years ago.\u201d Learn more on how I can help you here \u2192\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/author\/elaine\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"FOUNDATION OF LOVE - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition","description":"This year my theme word for the year is love.\u00a0 Courage, hope, delight, have been themes in previous years, and I never know what the current year will hold.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"FOUNDATION OF LOVE - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition","og_description":"This year my theme word for the year is love.\u00a0 Courage, hope, delight, have been themes in previous years, and I never know what the current year will hold.","og_url":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/","og_site_name":"Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition","article_published_time":"2011-08-09T21:22:09+00:00","author":"Elaine Froese","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Elaine Froese","Est. reading time":"5 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/"},"author":{"name":"Elaine Froese","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3"},"headline":"FOUNDATION OF LOVE","datePublished":"2011-08-09T21:22:09+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/"},"wordCount":970,"commentCount":0,"keywords":["attitude of love","Choice","Farm","farm bulk tank","Farm Families","Farm Family","farm family culture","farm family\u2019s love foundation","Farm folks","farm team","Farmers","Farming sons","love"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/","url":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/","name":"FOUNDATION OF LOVE - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#website"},"datePublished":"2011-08-09T21:22:09+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3"},"description":"This year my theme word for the year is love.\u00a0 Courage, hope, delight, have been themes in previous years, and I never know what the current year will hold.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/08\/09\/foundation-of-love\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"FOUNDATION OF LOVE"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/","name":"Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition","description":"","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3","name":"Elaine Froese","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/4df8162d4b4a0bb7b79f735f1fd39bc21a692ec62908384041c34339d64bd119?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/4df8162d4b4a0bb7b79f735f1fd39bc21a692ec62908384041c34339d64bd119?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Elaine Froese"},"description":"I\u2019m Elaine Froese, a lifelong farmer. Every day, I use my background in conflict resolution and communication to help fellow growers and ranchers face make-or-break issues head on \u2014 so they can focus on the business of farming. My expertise is sought after across Canada, and in the U.S. I'm a catalyst for courageous conversations, new scenarios and more profitable businesses. Many of my clients say: \u201cI wish I had met you 10 years ago.\u201d Learn more on how I can help you here \u2192","url":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/author\/elaine\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4748","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4748"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4748\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4748"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4748"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4748"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}