{"id":159,"date":"2011-12-15T21:30:57","date_gmt":"2011-12-15T21:30:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/elainefroese.primeconcepts.com\/blog\/?p=159"},"modified":"2011-12-15T21:30:57","modified_gmt":"2011-12-15T21:30:57","slug":"men-get-help-with-stress","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/","title":{"rendered":"Men, get help with stress"},"content":{"rendered":"
Men, get help with stress<\/strong>
\nJune 2009<\/div>\n
Weather stress this spring got a lot of farmers down. Add to that the issues of family, money, health and closed borders, and it has been a tough 2009.
\nThere is no shame in calling the stress line.<\/div>\n

As I write this in May, it\u2019s mental health week. Longtime readers know that 25 years ago I dealt with a very serious post-partum depression, and I am thankful to have had 25 years of good health since that hard year in l984. In my coaching journey, I have met many farmers who are feeling very down, trapped, and sometimes close to suicidal. They don\u2019t often want to admit that they need help. I am a coach, not a psychologist, but all of us can be supportive.<\/p>\n

You don\u2019t have to be a professional to help. \u201cIf you think something is wrong, don\u2019t be afraid to ask. The person at risk is likely wanting help but not knowing who or how to ask for help,\u201d says the Men at Risk brochure.<\/p>\n

Men at Risk is a unique program in central Alberta that is geared to helping men working in trades, industry and agriculture. I spoke with Irene Fraser, the program coordinator (email Irene.fraser@ech.ab.ca, or call 780-679-1241). The Men at Risk program in Alberta uses male presenters who share their experience with depression and stress.<\/p>\n

The facts: Seven out of 10 Canadians with depression are in the workforce (Stats Can). And almost half of workers surveyed thought that missing work because of depression would get them into trouble or fired. (Ipsos Reid Survey). Imagine the self-employed farmers who are depressed and struggling, the cows still need care, and machinery needs fixing. They don\u2019t want to admit they need help.<\/p>\n

WATCH FOR THESE SIGNS OF DEPRESSION<\/strong><\/p>\n

Many farm folks experience all kinds of loss, yet they don\u2019t reflect on how the losses are piling up. We\u2019ve lost great grain prices, some of us have lost parents, a marriage, a dream to own the home yard, etc. Recent experiences of a significant crisis (for example, death, loss of relationship, job or health crisis) can indicate that help is needed.
\n\u2022changes in eating and \/or sleeping habits
\n\u2022changes in behavior, energy level and attitude
\n\u2022anxious, restless or irritable feelings
\n\u2022hopeless or helpless feelings
\n\u2022withdrawing from others, lack of interest in activities
\n\u2022increased use of alcohol or drugs
\n\u2022thinking about, talking or joking about death or suicide
\n\u2022making final arrangements (If a person starts to give things away, this could be a sign.)<\/p>\n

Many spouses are scared when they see the behaviour of their loved ones changing for the worse. We all need to take courage and ask directly about:
\n\u2022How they are doing
\n\u2022How this situation is affecting them
\n\u2022How bad are things
\n\u2022If anyone else knows
\n\u2022If they are thinking about suicide
\n\u2022If they have tried to get help<\/p>\n

LISTEN<\/strong><\/p>\n

Listening is a great resource. We have two ears and one tongue for a reason!
\nListen to:
\n\u2022What they are saying about how they are feeling. Avoid making judgments
\n\u2022Find out where their pressures and pain are coming from
\n\u2022Don\u2019t jump in with advice right away.
\n\u2022Listen without arguing.
\n
\nWHERE DO YOU GO FOR HELP?<\/strong><\/p>\n

I\u2019d suggest calling your province\u2019s farm stress line. In Manitoba, Janet Smith, Stress Line Coordinator, is familiar with Alberta\u2019s Men at Risk program. The stress lines are in communication with other provinces and share resources.<\/p>\n

Encourage men to talk to someone rather than struggle with their problems alone. Find out what can be done to relieve the pressure. Maybe it\u2019s time to hire relief help. Let them know there is help for people who are feeling overwhelmed.<\/p>\n

Check on community services. I recommend seeing a doctor to check to see if depression is a factor.<\/p>\n

Get their agreement to take a first step towards getting help, and help them make the call. In Alberta, the mental health help line is 1-877-303-2642.<\/p>\n

If the person is at immediate risk, don\u2019t leave them alone. I have asked suicidal farmers directly \u201cAre you thinking of ending your life?\u201d. Listen for their response.<\/p>\n

In June we celebrate and honour our fathers. Many dads would love to hear their families say \u201cThanks for working so hard, we really appreciate all you do for us!\u201d The lack of appreciation can so easily be turned around into thankfulness. I\u2019ve seen families start to be more intentional about gratitude, which creates a healthier positive attitude in the family dynamic.<\/p>\n

Depression is an illness. We all need to de-stigmatize it, and be ready to ask for help.<\/p>\n

In my mind\u2019s eye, I see a young farmer in tears, face cupped in his hands, saying \u201cElaine I can\u2019t take this anymore!\u201d I listen. He seeks professional help. He now understands that men at risk are stronger when they don\u2019t walk the stress journey alone.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t take your relationships for granted. Be thankful that you can find help and healing. Walk down the lane together. Listen to one another.<\/p>\n

Have a wonderful Father\u2019s Day\u2026..Be well.<\/p>\n

_______________
\nElaine Froese facilitates tough family meetings as a professional certified coach and mediator.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Men, get help with stress June 2009 Weather stress this spring got a lot of farmers down. Add to that the issues of family, money, health and closed borders, and it has been a tough 2009. There is no shame in calling the stress line. As I write this in May, it\u2019s mental health week.…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[332,25,35,217,76,333,334],"class_list":["post-159","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","tag-depression","tag-farm","tag-farm-folks","tag-farm-stress","tag-farmers","tag-men","tag-stress"],"yoast_head":"\nMen, get help with stress - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"As I write this in May, it\u2019s mental health week. Longtime readers know that 25 years ago I dealt with a very serious post-partum depression, and I am thankful to have had 25 years of good health since that hard year in l984. In my coaching journey I have met many farmers who are feeling very down, trapped, and sometimes close to suicidal.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Men, get help with stress - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"As I write this in May, it\u2019s mental health week. Longtime readers know that 25 years ago I dealt with a very serious post-partum depression, and I am thankful to have had 25 years of good health since that hard year in l984. In my coaching journey I have met many farmers who are feeling very down, trapped, and sometimes close to suicidal.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-12-15T21:30:57+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Elaine Froese\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Elaine Froese\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Elaine Froese\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3\"},\"headline\":\"Men, get help with stress\",\"datePublished\":\"2011-12-15T21:30:57+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/\"},\"wordCount\":881,\"commentCount\":0,\"keywords\":[\"depression\",\"Farm\",\"Farm folks\",\"farm stress\",\"Farmers\",\"Men\",\"stress\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/\",\"name\":\"Men, get help with stress - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2011-12-15T21:30:57+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3\"},\"description\":\"As I write this in May, it\u2019s mental health week. Longtime readers know that 25 years ago I dealt with a very serious post-partum depression, and I am thankful to have had 25 years of good health since that hard year in l984. In my coaching journey I have met many farmers who are feeling very down, trapped, and sometimes close to suicidal.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Men, get help with stress\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/\",\"name\":\"Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3\",\"name\":\"Elaine Froese\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/4df8162d4b4a0bb7b79f735f1fd39bc21a692ec62908384041c34339d64bd119?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/4df8162d4b4a0bb7b79f735f1fd39bc21a692ec62908384041c34339d64bd119?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Elaine Froese\"},\"description\":\"I\u2019m Elaine Froese, a lifelong farmer. Every day, I use my background in conflict resolution and communication to help fellow growers and ranchers face make-or-break issues head on \u2014 so they can focus on the business of farming. My expertise is sought after across Canada, and in the U.S. I'm a catalyst for courageous conversations, new scenarios and more profitable businesses. Many of my clients say: \u201cI wish I had met you 10 years ago.\u201d Learn more on how I can help you here \u2192\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/author\/elaine\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Men, get help with stress - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition","description":"As I write this in May, it\u2019s mental health week. Longtime readers know that 25 years ago I dealt with a very serious post-partum depression, and I am thankful to have had 25 years of good health since that hard year in l984. In my coaching journey I have met many farmers who are feeling very down, trapped, and sometimes close to suicidal.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Men, get help with stress - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition","og_description":"As I write this in May, it\u2019s mental health week. Longtime readers know that 25 years ago I dealt with a very serious post-partum depression, and I am thankful to have had 25 years of good health since that hard year in l984. In my coaching journey I have met many farmers who are feeling very down, trapped, and sometimes close to suicidal.","og_url":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/","og_site_name":"Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition","article_published_time":"2011-12-15T21:30:57+00:00","author":"Elaine Froese","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Elaine Froese","Est. reading time":"4 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/"},"author":{"name":"Elaine Froese","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3"},"headline":"Men, get help with stress","datePublished":"2011-12-15T21:30:57+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/"},"wordCount":881,"commentCount":0,"keywords":["depression","Farm","Farm folks","farm stress","Farmers","Men","stress"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/","url":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/","name":"Men, get help with stress - Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#website"},"datePublished":"2011-12-15T21:30:57+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3"},"description":"As I write this in May, it\u2019s mental health week. Longtime readers know that 25 years ago I dealt with a very serious post-partum depression, and I am thankful to have had 25 years of good health since that hard year in l984. In my coaching journey I have met many farmers who are feeling very down, trapped, and sometimes close to suicidal.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2011\/12\/15\/men-get-help-with-stress\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Men, get help with stress"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/","name":"Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition","description":"","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/6960d626ab7e9f2f8f719815b7733dc3","name":"Elaine Froese","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/4df8162d4b4a0bb7b79f735f1fd39bc21a692ec62908384041c34339d64bd119?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/4df8162d4b4a0bb7b79f735f1fd39bc21a692ec62908384041c34339d64bd119?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Elaine Froese"},"description":"I\u2019m Elaine Froese, a lifelong farmer. Every day, I use my background in conflict resolution and communication to help fellow growers and ranchers face make-or-break issues head on \u2014 so they can focus on the business of farming. My expertise is sought after across Canada, and in the U.S. I'm a catalyst for courageous conversations, new scenarios and more profitable businesses. Many of my clients say: \u201cI wish I had met you 10 years ago.\u201d Learn more on how I can help you here \u2192","url":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/author\/elaine\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/159","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=159"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/159\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=159"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=159"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=159"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}