{"id":11395,"date":"2025-07-17T07:17:05","date_gmt":"2025-07-17T11:17:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/?p=11395"},"modified":"2025-07-21T15:39:32","modified_gmt":"2025-07-21T19:39:32","slug":"the-importance-of-learning-to-communicate-on-the-farm","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/07\/17\/the-importance-of-learning-to-communicate-on-the-farm\/","title":{"rendered":"The Importance of Learning to Communicate on the Farm"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>[et_pb_section fb_built=&#8221;1&#8243; admin_label=&#8221;section&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.24.2&#8243; collapsed=&#8221;off&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_row admin_label=&#8221;row&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.24.2&#8243; background_size=&#8221;initial&#8221; background_position=&#8221;top_left&#8221; background_repeat=&#8221;repeat&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;||1px|1px||&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; custom_padding=&#8221;|||&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221; custom_padding__hover=&#8221;|||&#8221;][et_pb_text admin_label=&#8221;Text&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.27.0&#8243; background_size=&#8221;initial&#8221; background_position=&#8221;top_left&#8221; background_repeat=&#8221;repeat&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;]<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/iPloqw1X6hQ?si=wklqXMG2zvwTYkEh\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I grew up on a family farm in Southern Manitoba. I have fond memories of those early years. Countless hours riding in the \u201cbuddy\u201d seat of the tractor or combine or swather, ripping around the yard on the quad or snowmobile, and exploring all the nooks and crannies of the old granaries. As I grew up, I graduated to purposeful tasks like delivering meals to the fields, cutting grass, and pulling weeds. Pretty soon after that, I was operating a grain cart, cultivating or harrowing fields, and hauling anhydrous wagons. All my peers in our small community were doing the same, and I\u2019m sure many of you had a similar experience. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Getting an education while growing up on the farm was just part of the package. I only realized it had happened later on in life during my first off-farm job as a carpenter. My boss had rented a telehandler loader for a job and announced that I\u2019d be driving it because \u201cYou\u2019re a farm kid, you can figure it out.\u201d I didn\u2019t think twice, hopped in, and sure enough, I had it figured out in less than a minute. After that, I began to pay attention to the wide array of skills I had acquired outside of the public school system. Even now, as I\u2019m about to turn 40 later this year, I\u2019m noticing abilities I have that I learned on the farm.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The learning environment on our family\u2019s farm was learn-by-observation, followed quickly by learn-by-doing. I\u2019m pretty sure it\u2019s the same on most other farms. The many hours riding with my Dad or Opa in a tractor were the observing part. I was mesmerized by the spinning augers of the pickup header or the way the soil would be thrown by a cultivator shovel. I connected the dots from a lever pull in the cab to the shifting equipment outside the cab, or how subtle changes in crop density would be reflected by engine noise, indicating that the driver should adjust. Furthermore, I was learning the spacial awareness required to maneuver a sometimes 120-foot-wide implement through a field. I was soaking it all in, learning everything I could through observation. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I was also receiving instruction while I rode along. My Dad would tell me specific things to watch out for and show me specific subtleties of each piece of equipment. There were certain ways that he preferred to drive, and he expected me to operate similarly when I would eventually take over. In other words, there were preferred ways and less preferred ways to operate the equipment.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stage two, or learn-by-doing, came quickly for some jobs and only later on for the more high-stakes tasks. I can\u2019t remember how old I was when I began cutting grass, but the stakes were relatively low, so perhaps around 10 years old. With my observational knowledge and a few instructions, I jumped on the lawn tractor and started mowing. Slowly at first, and as I gained confidence, the speed increased. Dad would give feedback, and then, when it was time to mow again, I would make those adjustments. I made mistakes, but the grass always grew back, so it was never a big deal. One time, however, I did drive over a water spigot, and that was a bigger deal!<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As I grew in age and experience, higher-stakes jobs became available. That meant that mistakes could lead to costly repairs or delays. I would take what I had already learned and apply it to the next responsibility, compounding my skillset. It wasn\u2019t long before I was able to operate all the equipment, in some cases before it was legal to do so (driving a tractor-trailer unit to and from the field on dirt roads when I was underage, for example). As my experience continued, learning to do new jobs or drive new equipment required fewer hours of training. By the time I went to work off-farm, jumping in a completely new-to-me tractor on a jobsite and figuring it out was easy because of my farm education. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The focus throughout all of my learning on the farm was on specific tasks or jobs that needed to be done. Not much attention was given to other skills required for employment like communication or conflict resolution. We just interacted with each other the way we knew best. I observed how my parents interacted with me and my siblings, their friends, each other, and with their parents. From birth, I developed patterns and habits of communicating. The learn-by-observing and learn-by-doing stages were combined; they are for everyone.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In any business, communicating can be complex. In a family business, it IS always complex. Most of our attention was given to the operational side of the farm business. In the summer months, there wasn\u2019t enough daylight to get everything done. In the winter months, our time was filled with all the work we didn\u2019t get to in the summer. We didn\u2019t take the time to consider the relational side of the farm. It didn\u2019t occur to us that communicating had high stakes &#8211; that errors in family relations could be just as costly as running a sprayer boom into a power pole. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I\u2019m not casting blame on anyone &#8211; learning relational skills like healthy communication is difficult and awkward. They are also easy to overlook when so much of farming requires timely, high-priority operational tasks. Farmers can \u201cget by\u201d for a long time without having to think about relationships. I only came to realize much later in life that each of my family members had a preferred way we liked to be communicated with. I learned that when I read a book about personality styles. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Learning how to become a healthy communicator or how to resolve conflict may be difficult, but it isn\u2019t impossible. The environment I grew up in and described to you was rich with skill development. We were all learning, day in, day out. Using our mistakes as opportunities to further develop our abilities. Evaluating our processes to become more efficient. I\u2019m sure your farm isn\u2019t any different. We can all learn to do just about anything. Start small and make little improvements. Compound your skills and apply them to higher-stakes conversations, and make even more improvements. Don\u2019t worry, you will fail, but everybody does; it\u2019s the best way to learn.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Did you enjoy <em><strong>The Importance of Learning to Communicate on the Farm<\/strong><strong>?<\/strong><\/em>\u00a0You might want to check these articles out too:<\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/07\/03\/why-farm-family-relationships-friendships-are-essential-for-mental-wellness\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">The Importance of Connecting with Family &amp; Friends<\/a><br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/06\/19\/farming-innovation-and-curiosity-how-to-foster-new-ideas-on-the-farm\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">New Ideas on the Farm<\/a><br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/06\/05\/encourage-your-farm-dad\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Encouraging Farm Fathers<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=&#8221;1&#8243; admin_label=&#8221;Section&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.24.2&#8243; _module_preset=&#8221;default&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_row admin_label=&#8221;Row&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.24.2&#8243; _module_preset=&#8221;default&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.17.6&#8243; _module_preset=&#8221;default&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_image src=&#8221;https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/How-To-Write-A-Letter-To-Get-Unstuck.jpg&#8221; title_text=&#8221;How To Write A Letter To Get Unstuck&#8221; url=&#8221;https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/insights\/free-stuff\/how-to-write-a-letter-to-get-unstuck\/&#8221; url_new_window=&#8221;on&#8221; admin_label=&#8221;Image&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.27.0&#8243; _module_preset=&#8221;default&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][\/et_pb_image][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Growing up on a family farm in Southern Manitoba taught me far more than how to drive equipment\u2014it shaped my work ethic, problem-solving, and even how I communicate. From early lessons in the buddy seat to learning by doing in the field, farm life quietly built a foundation of real-world skills that continue to serve me today, both on and off the farm.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":68,"featured_media":11397,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"<iframe title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/o4K6bItAbCY\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe>\r\n\r\nHarvest is in full swing on our farm, and I am not there\u2026for a few days. Where is it written you cannot leave the farm during harvest? (Almost on every page of the unpublished book \u201cThe Culture of Agriculture.\u201d)\r\n\r\nIf you are one of the 2800 folks who have stumbled upon \u201cFinding Fairness in Farm Transition\u201d on my YouTube channel at Farm Family Coach, you already know I am on a mission to change mindsets in agriculture. Fairness is helping everyone in the family be successful.\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Enter Scott Armstrong and his new workbook: <i>Mind Switch Retirement Planner<\/i>.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\r\n<img class=\"aligncenter wp-image-6952 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/Untitled-design-1024x512.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"512\" \/>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Armstrong is a speaker friend who shared his insights at a national financial planner September convention in Niagara Falls, the place I also journeyed to at the start of our September harvest. He uses the word \u201cretirement\u201d, for ag folks I prefer to use the term reinvention:<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><strong>Here are some things to consider as you age on your farm or ranch:<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n<ol class=\"ol1\">\r\n \t<li class=\"li1\"><b>What are the current roles you want to continue?<\/b> Which ones would you like to let go of? My farmer is coughing more after cleaning bins, and I am encouraging him to quit that task at age 65, which is now.<\/li>\r\n \t<li class=\"li1\"><b>Are you still passionate about farming?<\/b> Or just parts of it? Simon Sinek says, \u201cfulfillment comes when we live our lives on purpose\u201d. What is it you are doing on your farm where you lose all track of time? This summer I think my farmer lost track of mowing fields and ditches and waiting for the grain to ripen. I love to play with my grandkids and enjoy their giggles, stories, and curiosity. Play me with them is a sweet spot and I am intentional in making time for them. I am still passionate about helping farm families make intentional choices for a better quality of life and harmony through understanding.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t<li class=\"li1\"><b>Do your passion and purpose align with your spouse\u2019s vision<\/b>? This is where it gets messy. You want to leave the farm life roles and responsibilities, but your partner does not. Not for a long time! Where is it written you cannot pursue some things in different time zones or days apart from your spouse?<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>Independence is one of my core values, yet my husband respects what I need to fill my well, and I am happy when I return to the farm from my off-farm contracts and contacts. Love and respect for the other can go both ways.<\/li>\r\n \t<li class=\"li1\"><b>Adventure is big<\/b> on Scott Armstrong\u2019s workbook list. Farmers spend a lot of money on crop protection and other inputs. Many use the points from farm credit cards to fund short-term winter adventures. One of my clients is on a motorbike in the Maritimes as I write this. (Dairy farmer). Another farmer spends time in Mexico helping the poor build houses in the winter, and he wants to do more of this. Our adventures to visit friends in New Zealand, or travel with friends to Hawaii have been great times of renewal. Perhaps there is an ag tour you have been putting off. The GREAT PAUSE showed us how isolation and lack of adventure can really cramp our style, but we now have options. The most recent adventure for folks in our circle has been electric bikes. They are great for checking fields, riding down the Turtle Mountains to Boissevain, and going for a quick spin before supper. What is the adventure you have been putting off?<\/li>\r\n \t<li class=\"li1\"><b>Vitality is an energy we all want more of.<\/b> Armstrong is convinced we are only using 50% of our body\u2019s capacity. Our wonderful physician Dr. Nell shook his finger at us 5 years ago saying \u201cLook you two it\u2019s time you started having some fun. At 75 it all starts to fall apart!\u201d<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>This year I\u2019ve shed some weight via the app \u201cNOOM\u201d and am working on a better morning fitness routine. My friend, a cattle producer at age 68 does lots of stretching and 40 minutes on her elliptical every morning. She makes time for lots of hiking adventures and ensures her body is in great form. Armstrong has a great list of sleep hacks to have more renewal time.\r\nYour body is not a machine. Save money now by paying better attention to your health and making small habit changes to be healthier. Be kind to your brain and get off your devices long before bed. This will not kill you, and your marriage may be better off for the pillow talk without blue lights flashing from your cell phone or iPad, or TV.<\/li>\r\n \t<li class=\"li1\"><b>Finances:<\/b> The number one encouragement I have is to find a good financial planner who can guide you with your income streams and personal wealth as your farm assets keep growing. CAFA which is the Canadian Association of Farm Advisors has great advisors in their directory who understand the culture of agriculture and the challenges of debt servicing and the need for personal wealth options. See <span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"http:\/\/www.cafanet.ca\"><span class=\"s1\">www.cafanet.ca<\/span><\/a>.<\/span><\/li>\r\n \t<li><strong>Living Legacy:<\/strong> What do you want people to say about you BEFORE you die?\r\nI hope you have a wonderful 80th birthday party where folks can tell you in their own words and stories about how your life really was a blessing to them. Do you want to be able to set your grandkids up for financial success? Can you help fund their RESP for trades or university training? Could you help fund the local arts and culture or sports foundation of your small town? Would you be able to secretly give a \u201cleg up\u201d to a struggling single parent? Having the time to walk alongside newcomers to your community and financial support can be a huge blessing to making your town a great place to age gracefully. We live close to one of Manitoba\u2019s most beautiful small towns. The new bakeshop owner is now making sourdough bread with wheat head designs, plus great peanut butter marshmallow slices. This news may not excite you, but it is becoming a destination attraction. Sometimes it is the \u2018little things in life\u201d that make a day sweeter.<\/li>\r\n \t<li class=\"li1\"><b>Social times<\/b>. Armstrong surprised me with his challenge to question who your friends are and why. Post-Covid relationships look different, and you may be navigating the loss of long-time or childhood friends. Intentionally make a list of the folks who align with your purpose and plans for growth. I\u2019ll still a big fan of calling my far-away friends to keep relationships growing, yet I also know having tea in person is refreshing. I suspect the guys reading this are longing for more friendships beyond the farm gate. What are you DOING about it?<\/li>\r\n<\/ol>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Find out more about Scott Armstrong\u2019s fun, practical workbook at <span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"http:\/\/www.mindswitch.ca\"><span class=\"s1\">www.mindswitch.ca<\/span><\/a><\/span>, and reach out to the Mind Switch community on <span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/profile.php?id=100063687142266\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Facebook<\/a>.<\/span> Tell him you are working on changing the mindsets in agriculture, one family at a time.<\/p>\r\n<a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/insights\/free-stuff\/roles-storyboard\/\"><strong><span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\">Grab your copy of the Roles Storyboard<\/span><\/strong><\/a> to <span class=\"RFZYhc\">help you understand your 6 key roles - personal, couple, family, work (farm and off farm), friends, community.<\/span>\r\n\r\n***\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Elaine Froese is happy to be writing at 30,000 feet again. Invite her to speak at your next ag event. She has 30-plus years of practical insights for farmers to have the life they\u2019ve always wanted. One day at a time.\u00a0Visit <a href=\"http:\/\/www.elainefroese.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\">here <\/span><\/a>or Instagram <span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/farmfamilycoach\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">@farmfamilycoach<\/a><\/span> and hit the Linktree bio. Send cards to Box 957, Boissevain MB R0K 0E0.<\/p>\r\n<strong>Follow Elaine on Social for More Helpful Farm Family Advice!<\/strong>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/farmfamilycoach\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Facebook<\/a><\/span>\r\n<span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/farmfamilycoach\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Instagram<\/a><\/span>\r\n<span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/in\/farmfamilycoach\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">LinkedIn<\/a><\/span>\r\n<span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/elainefroese\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Twitter<\/a><\/span>\r\n<span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/c\/farmfamilycoach\/videos\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">YouTube<\/a><\/span>\r\n<span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@farmfamilycoach\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">TikTok<\/a><\/span>\r\n\r\nDid you enjoy<em><strong> How to re-invent your farm life as you age with Mind-Switch? <\/strong><\/em>You might want to check these articles out too:\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2022\/08\/25\/your-farms-emotional-tank-needs-checking\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Your Farm\u2019s Emotional Tank Needs Checking<\/a><\/span>\r\n<span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2022\/07\/14\/you-are-not-alone-2\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">You are not alone<\/a><\/span>\r\n<span style=\"color: #44b6ac;\"><a style=\"color: #44b6ac;\" href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2022\/06\/30\/how-to-love-a-farmer-2\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">How to Love a Farmer<\/a><\/span>","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[2276,2273,1109,2271,2272,2277,2275,2279,2278,2274],"class_list":["post-11395","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","tag-conflict-resolution-in-farming","tag-family-farm-life","tag-farm-family-communication","tag-farm-kid-skills","tag-growing-up-on-a-farm","tag-intergenerational-farm-learning","tag-learn-by-doing","tag-life-lessons-from-farming","tag-manitoba-farming-stories","tag-rural-education"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>The Importance of Learning to Communicate on the Farm<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A Manitoba farm kid reflects on how growing up on the farm built lifelong skills\u2014from machinery to communication and conflict resolution.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/07\/17\/the-importance-of-learning-to-communicate-on-the-farm\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Importance of Learning to Communicate on the Farm\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"A Manitoba farm kid reflects on how growing up on the farm built lifelong skills\u2014from machinery to communication and conflict resolution.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/07\/17\/the-importance-of-learning-to-communicate-on-the-farm\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2025-07-17T11:17:05+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2025-07-21T19:39:32+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/Farm-Communication.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"600\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"400\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Lyle Wiens\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Lyle Wiens\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"6 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" 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