{"id":11030,"date":"2025-05-13T03:47:29","date_gmt":"2025-05-13T07:47:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/?p=11030"},"modified":"2025-05-13T05:32:20","modified_gmt":"2025-05-13T09:32:20","slug":"narcissism-in-families-healing-identity-dynamics-on-the-farm","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/05\/13\/narcissism-in-families-healing-identity-dynamics-on-the-farm\/","title":{"rendered":"44: Navigating Narcissism on the Farm"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>[et_pb_section fb_built=&#8221;1&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_row _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; background_size=&#8221;initial&#8221; background_position=&#8221;top_left&#8221; background_repeat=&#8221;repeat&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; custom_padding=&#8221;|||&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221; custom_padding__hover=&#8221;|||&#8221;][et_pb_text admin_label=&#8221;Text&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.27.0&#8243; background_size=&#8221;initial&#8221; background_position=&#8221;top_left&#8221; background_repeat=&#8221;repeat&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;]<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/yFMW7EDy4R8?si=VoLGqvFuH0RQEBib\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<div class=\"player_container player-11030\" ><div class=\"spp_player_textabove\"><b>  <\/b><\/div><div id=\"sm2-11030\" class=\"sm2-11030 playercontent sm2-bar-ui compact flat full-width full-width-player\"><div class=\"bd sm2-main-controls\">\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"sm2-inline-element sm2-button-element\">\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"sm2-button-bd\" style=\"background: transparent url() repeat scroll 0% 0% \/ cover ;\">\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div 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class=\"sm2-progress-ball\"><div class=\"icon-overlay\"><\/div><\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"sm2-row timestamp timetext\" style=\"display:none;\"><div class=\"sm2-inline-time timestamp\">0:00<\/div><div class=\"sm2-inline-duration timestamp\">...<\/div><\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"sm2-inline-element sm2-button-element sm2-volume\" style=\"1\">\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t   <div class=\"sm2-button-bd\">\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"sm2-inline-button sm2-volume-control volume-shade\"><\/span>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"#volume\" class=\"sm2-inline-button sm2-volume-control\" style=\"\"><\/a>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t   <\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t  <\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"bd sm2-playlist-drawer sm2-element\">\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"sm2-playlist-wrapper\">\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<ul class=\"sm2-playlist-bd\"><li><a href=\"https:\/\/traffic.libsyn.com\/56d782f0-8d4c-422c-bdaa-d2db59d90bab\/EF_-_Ep._44_Podcast.mp3\">44: Navigating Narcissism on the Farm<\/a><\/li><\/ul>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div><div class=\"sppbuttons\" style=\"\"><a class=\"button-itunes\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/farm-family-harmony-podcast\/id1659119952?ls=1\">Apple Podcasts<\/a><a class=\"button-g-play\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"\">Google Podcasts<\/a><a class=\"button-embed\" rel=\"modal:open\"  id=\"button-embed\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"#ex1\">Player Embed<\/a><a class=\"button-share\" data-target=\"btnshare\" style=\"\" href=\"#\">Share<\/a>\r\n\t\t\t\t<div id=\"btnshare\" class=\"webui-popover-content share-buttons\">\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sharer\/sharer.php?u=https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/05\/13\/narcissism-in-families-healing-identity-dynamics-on-the-farm\/\" title=\"Share on Facebook\" target=\"_blank\" class=\"facebook\"><i class=\"fa fa-facebook\"><\/i><\/a>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/share?text=44%3A+Navigating+Narcissism+on+the+Farm -&url=https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/05\/13\/narcissism-in-families-healing-identity-dynamics-on-the-farm\/\" title=\"Share on Twitter\" target=\"_blank\" class=\"twitter\"><i class=\"fa fa-twitter\"><\/i><\/a>\r\n\t\t\t\t<\/div><a class=\"button-sppreview\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"http:\/\/getpodcast.reviews\/id\/1659119952\">Leave a Review<\/a><a class=\"button-spplisten\" style=\"display:none !important;\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"javascript:window.open('https:\/\/traffic.libsyn.com\/56d782f0-8d4c-422c-bdaa-d2db59d90bab\/EF_-_Ep._44_Podcast.mp3','','width=500,height=250')\">Listen in a New Window<\/a><a class=\"button-download\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/traffic.libsyn.com\/56d782f0-8d4c-422c-bdaa-d2db59d90bab\/EF_-_Ep._44_Podcast.mp3\">Download<\/a><a class=\"button-soundcloud\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"\">SoundCloud<\/a><a class=\"button-stitcher\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"\">Stitcher<\/a><a class=\"button-sppandroid\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"\">Subscribe on Android<\/a><a class=\"button-spprss\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"\">RSS Feed<\/a><a class=\"button-spotify\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0UCkbGF76mrbbP8UJdjP3e\">Spotify<\/a><a class=\"spp-button-custom1\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/playlist?list=PLiLbc86FzxuNJEtfbGkdnyb6w4P2X6beF\">YouTube<\/a><a class=\"spp-button-custom2\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"\"><\/a><a class=\"spp-button-custom3\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"\"><\/a><a class=\"spp-button-custom4\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"\"><\/a><a class=\"spp-button-custom5\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"\"><\/a><a class=\"spp-button-custom6\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"display:none !important;\" href=\"\"><\/a><\/div><\/div>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In this episode, my guest is Lauren Van Ewyk, co-founder of the National Farmer Mental Health Alliance, agricultural mental health advocate, social worker, foster parent, sheep farmer, and PhD student on a mission to give farmers better access to ag-informed therapists.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We explore what narcissism has to do with farm family dynamics and why not understanding the truth\u2014that we are fiercely loved and incredibly precious\u2014ultimately blocks us from healthy relationship dynamics and personal growth. This episode is full of practical strategies, insight, and resources to help you navigate the complexities of your life as a farmer.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cWhen you talk about that piece of identity, we have to understand that as farmers, sometimes we have tattooed across our forehead \u2018we&#8217;re a farmer\u2019. But that&#8217;s not all we are. We&#8217;re a spouse, a parent, a community member, or we might be a church contributor. There&#8217;s all different pieces of this identity, and we want to grow our sense of identity, not to minimize who we are as farmers, but to understand that we are complex people in a complex world, and we bring so much more to the table.\u201d <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&#8211;<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lauren Van Ewyk<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>Mentioned During This Episode<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>People<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.myfaithradio.com\/programs\/susie-larson-live\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Susie Larson: Author, Podcaster, Speaker<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.solutionsforresilience.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Patricia Morgan: Author, Speaker, Clinical Therapist<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><b>Books<\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/Emotional-Vampires-Dealing-Revised-Expanded-ebook\/dp\/B0087OUIM6\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Emotional Vampires <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">by Albert J. Bernstein<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/Words-That-Change-Minds-Mastering-ebook\/dp\/B07PVSR2J4\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Words That Change Minds <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">by Shelle Rose Charvet<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma\/dp\/0143127748\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Body Keeps The Score<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/Gift-Blessing-John-Trent\/dp\/0840748493\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Gift Of The Blessing <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">by John Trent<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/Five-Dysfunctions-Team-Leadership-Fable\/dp\/0787960756\/ref=sr_1_1?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.m-S3In8lXHSPxHFwaOT8TWK4A26YcHGHNoZ5KOxdKr_8fW2-yDLQjk07H6vstYZLqNr0caH9dZZCR57sGobltWDJLQoK3c6N-agczABdwr0Z_xJRgsmqepfRwVFNXBa4IxwHtQ1SMZykNF7fam_d8B-WMWvtU3KxDAldU_poGRWc4VdDrCmbaMBjetADdWU2hKPfqxd-ZSXbkfaCuYGuu1Lgvtf2Gi4zFWDAG4HDxRjunche2e2Ga-3iLCWC8gIIqdxqs3o6ZVEFICiExKiKx1ktHd4DpovnH3hHcT4F6TQ.AkHEK85GZg2PiUfzn6TYkI55kUhB77DMAzRXGRmIa5o&amp;dib_tag=se&amp;hvadid=666922971329&amp;hvdev=c&amp;hvlocphy=9001354&amp;hvnetw=g&amp;hvqmt=e&amp;hvrand=6045776144572101033&amp;hvtargid=kwd-295988457782&amp;hydadcr=16987_13579247&amp;keywords=the+five+dysfunctions+of+a+team&amp;mcid=c677bd20949635fc8163baad87dc91d4&amp;qid=1745452202&amp;sr=8-1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Five Dysfunctions of a Team<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> by Patrick Lencioni<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/Boundaries-Updated-Expanded-When-Control\/dp\/0310351804\/ref=sr_1_1?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.0BQsQUblBh6ICZAreiT3YgOji_B9Uiup2buOfkkpYoLwtlf_9CofVXNFbSFh73g4CWm_QKOdGHa-lm5_FY2mA5HImsdHuHBDD-YCHX_BQGGr1r8rzHYGl3UHZsntHFAyI6atmYXJ8Dag7gNfdbDptGrqcd05xAkKajdnP-mAGg4iFQoiw3XFTym5RyXk-n98Z1_t9k3en6x-GGfh5s4dzIMxSvJF2Lh00r1VBv90OwIIjjRTB0bNqU0Lz57DLRuWqOT8xP5jfslSBazvQAeTaM-ZdzpIRiTdCiyqWaDqc5Y.Nxg73nERcizAHBr364YBp4EqvA-Mi2LVv1P4ykSsW1g&amp;dib_tag=se&amp;hvadid=666823353786&amp;hvdev=c&amp;hvlocphy=9001354&amp;hvnetw=g&amp;hvqmt=e&amp;hvrand=16128093037760849544&amp;hvtargid=kwd-309422365095&amp;hydadcr=2880_13589075&amp;keywords=boundaries+by+henry+cloud&amp;mcid=7b5e63ee1a9331788104e013cbf17e5d&amp;qid=1745453395&amp;sr=8-1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i>Boundaries<\/i> by Henry Cloud<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><b>Podcast<\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.myfaithradio.com\/programs\/susie-larson-live\/your-true-identity-with-jamie-winship-1731016980\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your True Identity with Jamie Winship<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> (Susie Larson Live Podcast)<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><b>Course<\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.mediationserviceswpg.ca\/introducing-dealing-with-defensiveness-online-course\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dealing With Defensiveness (Mediation Services)<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Elaine Froese Resources &amp; Links<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li dir=\"ltr\"><a href=\"http:\/\/elainefroese.com\/speaking\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">SPEAKING \u2013 book Elaine for your next event<\/a><\/li>\n<li dir=\"ltr\"><a href=\"http:\/\/elainefroese.com\/coaching\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">COACHING \u2013 find your Farm Transition Coach<\/a><\/li>\n<li dir=\"ltr\"><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/membership\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">MEMBERSHIP \u2013 Join the Farm Family Harmony Membership waitlist<\/a><\/li>\n<li dir=\"ltr\"><a href=\"http:\/\/elainefroese.com\/free-planning-resources\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">RESOURCES \u2013 download for FREE<\/a><\/li>\n<li dir=\"ltr\"><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/contact\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">CONTACT \u2013 take the next steps in your transition<\/a><\/li>\n<li dir=\"ltr\"><a href=\"https:\/\/coachfroese.infusionsoft.app\/app\/form\/podcast-questions\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>About Our Guest<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-11032 alignnone alignleft\" src=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/Screen-Shot-2025-05-12-at-9.15.48-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"138\" height=\"133\" srcset=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/Screen-Shot-2025-05-12-at-9.15.48-PM.png 350w, https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/Screen-Shot-2025-05-12-at-9.15.48-PM-300x290.png 300w, https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/Screen-Shot-2025-05-12-at-9.15.48-PM-120x116.png 120w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 138px) 100vw, 138px\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lauren Van Ewyk is an engaging speaker, podcaster, registered social worker, foster mom, and agricultural mental health advocate. She has appeared in numerous radio, television, and print articles concerning the issues of adoption, foster care, mental wellness, and mental health in the agriculture sector.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lauren works with businesses, individuals, and families all across Canada to \ufb01nd hope and healing. She and her husband raise sheep in southwestern Ontario.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/nfmha.ca\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">National Farmer Mental Health Alliance<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/nfmha.ca\/who-we-are\/affiliates\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Find An Ag-Informed Therapist\u00a0<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/ca\/podcast\/the-rural-well\/id1763638851\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Rural Well Podcast<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/people\/National-Farmer-Mental-Health-Alliance\/100083346786698\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Facebook<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/nfmhalliance\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instagram<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/ca.linkedin.com\/company\/national-farmer-mental-health-alliance\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">LinkedIn<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Submit a Question<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Have a burning question you\u2019d like answered on the show by Elaine or one of her amazing coaches? Ask it\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/coachfroese.infusionsoft.app\/app\/form\/podcast-questions\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">HERE<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p><b>Share Your Thoughts<\/b><\/p>\n<p>Did you enjoy this episode of the Farm Family Harmony Podcast? Keep the conversation going by sharing your experiences and perspectives in the comments below. Your involvement is what makes this community THRIVE! Have your say \u2013 we\u2019re all ears!<\/p>\n<p>Help us grow our community by rating the show or submitting a review on\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0UCkbGF76mrbbP8UJdjP3e\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Spotify<\/a>\u00a0or\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/ca\/podcast\/farm-family-harmony-podcast\/id1659119952\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Apple<\/a>. Sharing an episode with your community, family, and friends, or commenting on\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/farmfamilycoach\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Instagram<\/a>\u00a0is another great way to show your support!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Timestamps<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span>[0:00:30]<\/span> The story of Elaine\u2019s stuffed sheep<br \/><span>[0:02:25]<\/span> Introduction to Lauren Van Ewyk<br \/><span>[0:03:10]<\/span> What is a narcissist when it comes to farm family dynamics<br \/><span>[0:05:48]<\/span> Helpful language for dealing with feeling attacked<br \/><span>[0:07:52]<\/span> You play an invaluable role in our world and community<br \/><span>[0:09:46]<\/span> Curiosity is a really valuable tool<br \/><span>[0:11:24]<\/span> It\u2019s all about identity<br \/><span>[0:14:25]<\/span> What does \u2018dropping a stone\u2019 mean<br \/><span>[0:15:44]<\/span> The impact of generational trauma<br \/><span>[0:17:02]<\/span> Unhelpful guilt and people pleasing<br \/><span>[0:19:58]<\/span> The dark side of resilience and workaholism<br \/><span>[0:22:18]<\/span> How to begin navigating towards a healthy dynamic on the farm<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Social worker &#038; ag mental health advocate Lauren Van Ewyk unpacks narcissism in families, identity, and practical tools for navigating farm family relationships.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":11036,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"[spp-player url=https:\/\/traffic.libsyn.com\/56d782f0-8d4c-422c-bdaa-d2db59d90bab\/EF_-_Ep._34_Libsyn.mp3]\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In this episode, my guest is Farm Family Coach <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/coaching\/coaching-team\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lyle Wiens<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> - a professional Agrologist and Grain Marketing Advisor, with training in conflict management, mediation, and group facilitation.<\/span><\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We discuss Lyle\u2019s knowledge on an approach to leadership called the \u201cArt of Hosting\u201d, including the four Principles of Dialogue in which the goal is a meaningful and impactful dialogue that is respectful, creative, generative, and allows for solutions. Listeners will gain insightful and practical wisdom on how to achieve a farm family transition that is oriented towards creating conditions for positive relationships and building healthy teams and organizational culture.<\/span><\/p>\r\n<i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cActually, I morally judge people all the time, and then all of a sudden I find myself in a conversation with them, and it's really rewarding, and I'm totally surprised. See what happens when you're open to curiosity about someone? In the Art of Hosting, we call these limiting beliefs. We look at someone and think that person is not capable of [something], or they can't see a way through this scenario, [but this is simply my own limiting belief at play].\u201d <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">-Lyle Wiens<\/span>\r\n\r\n<strong>Mentioned During This Episode<\/strong>\r\n\r\n<b>Books\u00a0<\/b>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/Nonviolent-Communication-Language-Life-Changing-Relationships\/dp\/189200528X\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Nonviolent Communication, A Language of Life<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> by Marshall Rosenberg<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/Crucial-Conversations-Third-Joseph-Grenny\/dp\/1260474186\/ref=sr_1_3?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.ISzjC04XT9oNYVlH76lANPrs8hRARi4g6V4HTvljmnfWCBm3ZRcl6S2VpsHMWmXEL0CsHK9Ra1jpVL1LrzY5PNlto88oZ_1GAxFQzruqA_OCNgAgOeOk70Q74aI3khlSM2ZySBhe_yg1fohyrzXjjNSlX3nsq0Ezz3h4U5RI44drBDYT-h7qX8ENtfFLvt0bq471-PJDefD8gYMWA4rZGzFPVF5Ip39D0sh12XGNki-vMdYxCSnOUWsTP1e7PCyQIDqbVz_M_Acd-RwMaV_IlYPCjpupjoBV8KRwOHSWihg.XcYELqLzBFE_qz1LfkBTAHZgTH9lGV9Pf8uWeJXmILQ&dib_tag=se&hvadid=599307924927&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9001353&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=3963633315950015572&hvtargid=kwd-311912085817&hydadcr=16959_13463063&keywords=the+crucial+conversation&qid=1733173730&sr=8-3\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Crucial Conversations, Tools for Talking When Stakes are High <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">by Patterson, Grenny, McMillan and Switzler<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/Polarity-Management-2nd-Identifying-Unsolvable\/dp\/0874251761\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Polarity Management, Identifying and Managing Unsolvable<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Problems by Barry Johnson<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/Gifts-Imperfection-Anniversary-Features-brand-new\/dp\/1616499605\/ref=sr_1_1?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.b2Klwn53I2rokXqWdq6upqYD-6xQLTK0kTWrvt-W82JvJx85LXBvDQlHqnRW2VKGDSPbS7KkbEsD2WJKAGOVZBjD_oR9wDafAKuFACu9Swjpp6DvCYKBnZ-CmDH2o-Y13_6LgKgGtgqv5NHFbKNNN7OZwCFZhZleYH910ceob43p1HiDQV-FTZInOYywZ1jrBeNgyIEwabiovsOzE2jiYSa8w1pLwNx4FIrXByltsrnrfyoFnzByXFS4_t9bqzUDgQrCsHwsahIeR5OvEm9uhWzxQsBlFt_nCCO-8sVCiEsePe9xQvLBuGxQE5ZjA_IcieffuMXL0IAmvVqeBWRMIZEedlhTxKZRK9jXhcRLqhEKGez5Vok-CNd0Hk8lceLKwSSxN7Y-RFOeOwkaYRlxNKsFGZ0MclVHg7pUBTRkfGBT-bvHqMUz0UuETT_J-Pod.pOK3yL4SJzj3hNoJHVP38A9GsF_QM8qh4Dz0jvPafc8&dib_tag=se&hvadid=599427856982&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9001353&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=7669385332039799067&hvtargid=kwd-301880260548&hydadcr=14979_13429897&keywords=the+gift+of+imperfection&qid=1733944509&sr=8-1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Gifts of Imperfection <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">by Bren\u00e9 Brown<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.ca\/When-Sorry-Isnt-Enough-Chapman\/dp\/0802407048\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When Sorry Isn\u2019t Enough<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> by Dr. Gary Chapman<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<b>Course\u00a0<\/b>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/artofhosting.org\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">The <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Art of Hosting<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<b>Podcast Episodes\u00a0<\/b>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2023\/10\/02\/08-culture-beats-strategy-believe-behave-decide\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Farm Family Harmony Podcast (Ep 08) \/ Culture Beats Strategy: Believe, Behave, Decide<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<b>People<\/b>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.polaritypartnerships.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Barry Johnson: Founding Partner, Chairman & Creator of The Polarity Map\u00ae and Principles<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/brenebrown.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Bren\u00e9 Brown: American Academic and Podcaster<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.focusonthefamily.com\/contributors\/gary-chapman\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dr. Gary Chapman: <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">International Public Speaker and Best-selling Author<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.cnvc.org\/about\/marshall\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dr. Marshall B. Rosenberg, Ph.D: Founder of the Center for Nonviolent Communication<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/viktorfranklamerica.com\/viktor-frankl-bio\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Viktor E. Frankl: Author and Holocaust Survivor<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<b>Blog Posts<\/b>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2023\/08\/03\/how-to-say-sorry-at-harvest-2\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How to Say \u201cSorry\u201d at Harvest <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">by Elaine Froese<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2024\/09\/12\/thinking-inside-the-box-of-lateral-thinking\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Thinking Inside the Box of Lateral Thinking<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> by Lydia Carpenter<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2022\/09\/22\/the-power-of-a-letter-to-get-unstuck\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The power of a letter to get unstuck<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> by Elaine Froese<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<b>Other<\/b>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/coaching\/conflict-dynamics-profile\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Conflict Dynamics Profile<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<strong>Elaine Froese Resources & Links<\/strong>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"http:\/\/elainefroese.com\/speaking\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"http:\/\/elainefroese.com\/coaching\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/membership\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">MEMBERSHIP - join the waitlist for the\u00a0 Farm Family Harmony Member<\/span>ship<\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"http:\/\/elainefroese.com\/free-planning-resources\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">RESOURCES - download for FREE<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n \t<li aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/contact\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<strong>About Our Guest<\/strong>\r\n\r\n<img class=\"wp-image-10342 alignnone alignleft\" src=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/Screen-Shot-2024-12-18-at-12.23.42-AM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"160\" height=\"136\" \/>\r\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lyle is a Professional Agrologist with the Manitoba Institute of Agrologists and has a Bachelor of Science degree in Agricultural Economics from the University of Manitoba. He also has training in conflict management, mediation, and group facilitation. He works as a Grain Marketing Advisor where he assists farmers as they produce and sell their crops.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\r\n\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li><a href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/coaching\/coaching-team\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Coaching Profile<\/span><\/a><\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<strong>Submit a Question<\/strong>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have a burning question you\u2019d like answered on the show by Elaine or one of her amazing coaches? Ask it <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/coachfroese.infusionsoft.app\/app\/form\/podcast-questions\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">HERE<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<b>Share Your Thoughts<\/b>\r\n\r\nDid you enjoy this episode of the Farm Family Harmony Podcast? Keep the conversation going by sharing your experiences and perspectives in the comments below. Your involvement is what makes this community THRIVE! Have your say \u2013 we\u2019re all ears!\r\n\r\nHelp us grow our community by rating the show or submitting a review on\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0UCkbGF76mrbbP8UJdjP3e\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Spotify<\/a>\u00a0or\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/farm-family-harmony-podcast\/id1659119952%20\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Apple<\/a>. Sharing an episode with your community, family, and friends, or commenting on\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/farmfamilycoach\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Instagram<\/a>\u00a0is another great way to show your support!\r\n\r\n<strong>Timestamps<\/strong>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:00:30 Introduction to Lyle Wiens<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:03:34 Art of Hosting and the Principles of Dialogue<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:05:33 Key Principles of the Principles of Dialogue<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:08:42 What it means to \u201chost yourself\u201d<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:10:03 Listening vs Convincing<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:10:42 Barry Johnson and Polarity<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:13:51 Honoring the intensity of agriculture<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:18:00 Power dynamic in farm family transition<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:18:45 Navigating and hosting powerful people<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:20:00 Sitting with tension and being conflict-aware<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:22:23 The stories we tell ourselves<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:23:25 Power, Control, and Perfectionism<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:25:42 Nonviolent Communication<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:26:23 Life-alienating Communication<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:27:26 Moralistic Judgements<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:29:16 Limiting Beliefs<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:31:35 There\u2019s always a choice<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:36:25 Crying and the culture of love<\/p>\r\n<p dir=\"ltr\">0:35:42 A generational resistance to face-to-face conversation<\/p>","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1473],"tags":[2229,887,2235,2234,2062,2231,2230,2233,2228,2232],"class_list":["post-11030","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-farm-family-harmony-podcast","tag-agricultural-mental-health","tag-farm-family-dynamics","tag-farm-resilience","tag-generational-trauma","tag-healthy-boundaries","tag-identity-and-trauma","tag-lauren-van-ewyk","tag-mental-health-in-farming","tag-narcissism-in-families","tag-rural-relationships"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Narcissism in Families: Healing Identity &amp; Dynamics on the Farm<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Explore narcissism in families &amp; farm life with Lauren Van Ewyk\u2014gain tools for healing, identity growth &amp; healthy dynamics.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/05\/13\/narcissism-in-families-healing-identity-dynamics-on-the-farm\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Narcissism in Families: Healing Identity &amp; Dynamics on the Farm\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Explore narcissism in families &amp; farm life with Lauren Van Ewyk\u2014gain tools for healing, identity growth &amp; healthy dynamics.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/elainefroese.com\/2025\/05\/13\/narcissism-in-families-healing-identity-dynamics-on-the-farm\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Elaine Froese | Canada\u2019s Farm Whisperer | Your go-to expert for farm families who want better communication and conflict resolution to secure a successful farm transition\" 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